By my side   von April_Jones
                             (Dean&Castiel Poems)
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                             Kapitel 1: By my side
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Drown me in your ocean tide,
Burn me in your graceful light,
Drag me in your falling fight,
Rate me in your darkest right,
No matter, just stay by my side.
Don’t look at me all the time
Or I can‘t pretend all is fine,
Pretend you did’t make me whole.
Do you recognize my whacked soul?
 ~ 
In your touch I thrive,
Isn’t much, just my life.
Regardless down you dive,
Ensure it’s me who‘ll survive,
You dragged me up almost too late,
Never believed in things like fate.
My second birthday, that date,
Realize I never really celebrate.
 ~ 
The streets are getting colder,
Still I feel your hand on my shoulder
Like I kept it in me, your ardent ember.
Not only your mark my soul will remember.
My next life began in the middle of September
And ended with you at the fifth of November.
Yeah, they were hard and rough,
But twelve years are not enough.
 ~ 
Desperately I held myself up strong,
Pretending it’s not you to whom I belong.
I was blind and wrong. You had me all along.
How could you see my soul shine bright,
When there’s so much it has to hide?
I never had to be tough by your side,
So I let myself be weak.
Your eyes I’ll always seek.
 ~ 
Let me drown in your ocean tide,
Let me burn in your graceful light,
Let me fall in your highest flight,
And tell me everything’s alright,
Say in the end you’ll be by my side,
Look at me just one last time,
And let us pretend all will be fine.
Don’t you know, you‘re my sunshine?
Don’t leave me in the dark, be mine.
 ~ 
I didn’t know you could feel this way.
What would I give for one more day,
There’s so much I have to say
You never knew, I hide too deep.
I’m sorry, I was too weak.
Still your eyes I always seek.
Hope when I close mine it’s you I‘ll see
And the day will come we both be free.
 ~ 
I didn’t catch you falling constantly.
You gave up everything for me,
Your faith, your home, your loyalty,
Your brothers and sisters, your family,
Your principles, your dignity,
The war and an entire army,
While I just sharpened my knife.
You sacrificed your life.
 ~ 
I wish I said it back,
Revealed all cards of my deck.
I need you, but words lack.
In front of my eyes you faded away.
Never wanted you that price to pay.
I hope you can forgive me one day.
My body in the ground they‘ll lay,
With you in Heaven I will stay.
 ~ 
I will drown in your ocean tide,
I will burn in your graceful light,
I will turn in your endless flight,
I will hurl in your stormy might,
In the end I will be by your side.
Till then look down on me in time,
And I will pretend I am almost fine.
Faithful I will never stop to pray,
Till I come home to you someday.
 . 
.
- Dean

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